Having the Talk with Your Son
Many parents feel unprepared and incompetent when it comes to teens talk, haunted by their own recollections of meandering from childhood to adolescence. The key to minimizing stress and smoothing the sometimes-rough road to adolescence is correct information. Accurate information delivered gently and confidently can help alleviate a boy's concerns and reassure him that the changes in his body are normal and natural. The easiest approach to achieve this is for moms and dads to become educated on the basics of puberty. Parenting involves ensuring the right knowledge about your son's developing sexuality reaches him, or the media, internet, and friends might fill the void, with some bits of incorrect information.
Boys' puberty is best described as a biological transformation and transition into adulthood that involves deeper voice cords, increased hair growth, and becoming broader at the shoulders and narrower at the hips. It usually begins between the ages of 9 and 14. It's critical to begin explaining puberty - and the changes that boys and girls go through - as soon as possible, ideally before he or others in his class begin to experience it. Here's how to talk to your son about puberty and help him understand what periods are like for girls.
Starting the Conversation
When you're having the teens talk and explain puberty to your son, it's a great time to bring up the topic of periods. Tell him that while girls and boys go through many of the same things – growing taller, hair growth under their arms and in the pubic area and experiencing new emotions – there are some differences. It's crucial to talk to your son about this era of his life, as awkward as it may be for both of you. Not just once, either. Multiple interactions are required, with plenty of possibilities for questions throughout the process.
Explain Physical Changes
Explain to your son the changes that are coming to his body. Puberty is the transformation of a child's body into that of a young adult. These alterations are caused by the pituitary gland in our brain. It transmits messages to the rest of the body, after which a hormone called testosterone is released. Hair will begin to grow on his face, under his arms, and other places of his body. His voice will get lower in tone, and his sexual organs will begin to resemble those of an adult. Some guys experience these changes around the age of 11 or 12, while others experience them a little later. Each person's exact timing varies and is determined by the genes they inherited.
Puberty in boys -
- During puberty, boys develop testicles, which begin to generate sperm
- Sperm is required for reproduction
Puberty in girls –
- Girls have ovaries that contain eggs and a uterus that can grow a baby
- An egg is discharged from the ovaries every month. If the sperm fertilizes the egg, it will lodge in the uterine lining and develop into a baby
- If the egg is not fertilized, the lining of the vaginal canal comes out once a month as a period.
- The menstrual cycle is a natural, healthy process that a girl's body goes through on a monthly basis.
Explain Emotional Changes
During puberty, your child will begin to feel a variety of emotions. He may feel more energized at times while quite low at other times. Some children's moods fluctuate, making them happy one day and sad the next. If you let him know that such feelings are normal, he'll understand that it's all part of the maturation process. Make him aware that in addition to those feelings, he’ll also begin to think and feel differently about girls. He'll begin to notice them and pay greater attention to their appearance. Emotional changes also make up for a big part of teens talk.
Explaining Periods
Talking about periods with boys is an important part of parenting. It may feel awkward at first but having open dialogues with them will help them understand that periods are natural, healthy, and nothing to be ashamed of. Pre-menstrual symptoms that a girl may feel, such as cramps, headaches, and bloating, are an important aspect of discussing puberty to your son. Tell him that a girl's sensitivity may increase in the days leading up to her period, and that he shouldn't take it personally – it could just be her changing hormones.
Explain how vital it is for boys and girls to support and be aware of each other's feelings as they go through puberty.
Encourage Questions
It's crucial to understand that having the talk with your son is only the start, and your kid may have plenty of questions that arise multiple times during his adolescence. Assure him that you are available and eager to discuss any of his concerns, including puberty, girls and sex too.
Do’s and Don’t
Remember the below pointers when having the talk with your son about periods and puberty.
Do’s |
Don’ts |
---|---|
Be concise and to the point | Avoid using euphemisms |
Encourage empathy | Do not underestimate his emotions |
Keep things positive | Do not avoid questions |